Prezzies

The Marauder Vacation Resort



In a world full of dunderheads and blithering idiots, the most wonderful people in the world need a place to get away from it all. For this reason, by magic and by manpower (or womanpower, moot point), the Marauder Vacation Resort was built. Its spacious halls (it's bigger on the inside ) and beautiful grounds are fit for royalty, which is of course appropriate because that's what Marauders are, after all. The fabulous four are waited on by a full staff of house elves (and, occasionally, adoring fans).

Due to the laziness of various and sundry Marauders, there is no map of the Resort, and estimates of the number of rooms therein range from 24 to 147 (though admittedly the second guess is extremely generous. Each room has a purpose, even if its purpose is to have a room to do absolutely nothing in.

KITCHEN



Although the Marauders have a full staff of house elves to take care of the cooking if no one is in the mood for it, there is also a beautiful, restaurant-quality kitchen for the use of the girls (but especially Moony). Besides the cooktops and the spacious ovens, there are blenders, processors, ice cream and snowball machines, a cotton candy (or fairy floss, to Prongs) spinner, a room for hanging meats, a smoker, a grill, and an enormous pantry. The pantry is of course always fully stocked with boxes upon boxes of macaroni (to be smothered in homemade cheese sauce), shelves of spices and sauces (especially barbecue), and of course, the candy corner. There is never a shortage of lollies (Prongs) or chocolate (everyone, but don't touch Moony's). Moony is the official Marauder of the kitchen and she can often be found manically decorating cakes or trying to perfectly caramelize onions. The other Marauders often raid the pantry or fridge and can sometimes be found sitting down to a meal there, no matter who has made it.

LIBRARY

The library is the largest room in the resort because it is made up of several smaller rooms. There is a central gathering room, with large, red, cushioned couches in a circle in the middle of the room. There are lamps and tables around the outside of the room, just in case the Marauders want to write or drabble, and can't do it without a hard surface. There are lots of outlets and surge protectors located throughout the room. The library also contains a small computer room with a printer, scanner, and several other electronic devices. There are several quiet reading areas, nooks and crannies where the Marauders can go to study or read in peace. Wormtail is inordinately fond of them, enjoying searching out the most obscure places to tuck away and hide.

Most importantly, though, are the stacks. This library is incredibly well-stocked with books, with the standard sections of a library: fiction, nonfiction, teen, reference, media, and periodicals. The bookshelves go on and on for ages, and it is easy to get lost just wandering around, looking at the books. There is information on every major project the Marauders have researched together, as well as collections of favorite fanfictions and stories and drabbles that have been compiled by the resident librarians.

PRIVATE QUARTERS

Moony

The Moony Blues Suite (or Moony's room, since everyone else refuses to call it something so pretentious) is a small and very cluttered room. The walls were originally light blue, but it's now nearly covered in quotes, lyrics, or doodles in navy. Moony's bed is big enough for three, but only if they're planning on getting very cozy. The sheets, comforter, and pillowcases never stay one color longer than a week because Moony is very wishy-washy. The chest-of-drawers is big enough for all of her clothes, plus a giant top drawer full of random junk she can't throw out but can't put anywhere else. The closet is walk-in and is split directly in half: porn stash on one side, music on the other; where they meet in the middle isn't music from pornos, but it is music good enough to be porn. The blackout curtains keep the sun from disturbing the resident from her excessive beauty slumber. All of Moony's books are kept in the library, except for the 24 or so she may be reading at one time, which will all be inevitably strewn around in the bed with her.

Wormtail

Wormtail's room is small and cozy, a little nook in the corner of the tree house. The walls are a light blueish green and the ceiling is covered with glowing stars. The bed is big and soft, and the sheets are blue and white. Wormtail does not particularly care if they match, as long as they are comfortable and warm and soft. There is a small dresser in the corner of the room that is covered in knick-knacks Wormtail has collected over the years. The dresser is wood and simple, and it has just enough space for her to fit her belongings in it. She also has a nightstand to put her alarm, glasses, and watch on. She has a bookshelf in the room with her favorite books and a closet, though she doesn't need anything big. She does not need a TV, but she has to have her computer in the room with her. She has a large window overlooking the world outside, and she has a plant or two in the windowsill. She has blinds, but she never actually pulls them shut.

Padfoot

Padfoot's room has a small sign on the outside, saying, "Enter if you dare."

None of us dared.


Prongs

Prongs's room's walls are covered in bits and bats, from Quidditch team posters to photos of the Marauders on their many adventures. She has a small bookshelf in the corner, with a few books and photo albums that are not kept in the library. She has a medium-sized bed that is soft and squishy, perfect for snuggling up in. Her walls are a cool blue, and she has an assortment of lamps hidden in her large, walk-in closet. She has a nightstand and a dresser, both made of the same shade of mahogany.

SUPER HAPPY SLUMBER PARTY TIME

There is a room that is in the center of the house that is perfect for sleepovers, when the four Marauders don't feel like splitting up for the night. It's a large room, with beds that can be pulled out of the closets. When the Marauders don't feel like pulling out their beds, there are sleeping bags and comforters tucked away to pull out. The carpet is a soft, shaggy green, and the walls are a deep, midnight blue. After all, the sleepover room couldn't have decorations that are biased, can they? There are board games and there is a mini-fridge stocked with water, orange soda, and other drinks and snacks. There is a microwave for heating up popcorn and a wide-screen TV with a blu-ray player, for when they feel like staying up late and popping a movie in.

GARAGE



Although the Marauders are perfectly happy spending their time in their expansive house, sometimes they just need to get out and adventure like good troublemakers do. The garage contains the 'family car' (a big blue Jeep that will forge a trail through anything they could possibly want to drive through) as well as the individual cars of each of the girls. Moony's 1967 Chevy Impala (tuxedo black, of course) is kept in spit-spot condition, and Wormtail's mint green Volkswagon Beetle is well-cared for as well. There are an assortment of other classic cars (some in working order and some not) scattered in the garage, along with some brand new models of the very fastest sports cars. There are tools scattered everywhere from the attempt to teach the house elves to be mechanics. Also residing in the garage are four-wheelers, go-karts, dirtbikes, and of course, a few motorcycles (including the infamous flying one).

MISCELLANEOUS LAVISH NONSENSE

Of course, a house is not just about its functional parts. Beyond the basic living spaces of the house, there are many, many rooms built just for the pleasure of each of the girls. A state of the art, sound-proofed studio is tucked away in one wing for the recording of all musical pursuits. The theater room is a huge room with a giant screen and many cushy couches with cup-holders; it is stocked with popcorn and soda machines and many, many movies and seasons of television shows. The eight Harry Potter movies have a place of honor, although it is agreed that there is far too little Marauder action in the damn things. There is a gym (complete with sauna), a fully stocked game room (both system-based games and things like pinball and skeeball), and of course a giant indoor pool shaped like the lake at Hogwarts. Once, Prongs opened a door to find an entire room filled with multi-colored plastic balls. None of them have quite figured that one out. These are just a few of the many places scattered about in the lovely resort.


So, stranger, do you like the sound of our beautiful home? Want to spend a few nights inside the exquisite Marauder Vacation Resort?

Well, too bad.

If your name isn't Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, or Prongs, your luck has run out. Cheers!